


21) Farewell is not goodbye.

by Munnin



Series: Hugin Chronicles [21]
Category: Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2017-07-23
Packaged: 2018-12-05 20:03:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11585223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Munnin/pseuds/Munnin
Summary: Before parting company, Tahl and the Squad get a chance to get to know each other.





	21) Farewell is not goodbye.

**Author's Note:**

> Red Mist Squad based on characters created by Joe Hogan for the [ The Siren of Dathomir](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3z0kyf53Ds) and [ Panic Over Muunilinst ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3-_EnhMEDE). Stolen, run away with, and abused with his permission.
> 
> The Grey Jedi and Odd Squads are original characters based on members of the CSWCC. The original Argument’s End series can be found [here](http://munnin.dreamwidth.org/tag/grey+jedi+verse).

Red Mist were readying the ship to leave when Rebec came to find Fordo. Crispy was sitting on the bottom step, playing with the two tiny kittens when she arrived. 

Whatever she was about to say got utterly lost at the sight of them. “Are those- how did you-” She dropped to her knees, hands out at the kittens came scampering over. “Phantom panther kittens! But how? They’re a myth! At least everyone thought they were.”

“Lady,” Crispy shook his head as the kittens butted against her for attention. “I’ve got scars to prove they’re real. Those things nearly killed us.” 

“There was more than one?” Her eyes went wider still. “Tahl never told me. That’s incredible!” She petted the little kittens who capered about, chasing her fingers. “What will you do with them?”

At that, Crispy’s expression darkened. “I don’t know. We’re going to be dropping into hot territory. Can’t really take them with us. Not till they grow up anyway. Figure they might be useful in a fight, if we can train them.”

Rebec shook her head, as the kittens chased the end of her long braid. “If half the stories are true, they live a very long time. Longer than we will, that’s for sure.” 

It was then Crispy realised Rebec didn’t know about their accelerated maturation. That Tahl would age so much faster than her, die so much sooner. He wanted to be happy that Tahl was staying with the sisters, that Tahl had hope for a better life but in his heart, Crispy still mourned his brother. Was mourning. A process of letting go. 

He sniffed and looked down at the kittens. “I guess- I don’t know then. Maybe- you could take them back to Silvestri VII? You and Eva and- Tahl could look after them. Just till we came back.” He clarified, wanting to make it very clear he was not giving them up. 

“So, you’re coming back?” She asked, softly hopeful. “That’s kinda what I can to talk to your captain about. Look, I know there’s stuff in Tahl’s past that worry him but-” She looked up, realising Fordo was standing just a few metres away, listening. “He wants to know you. He wants to know his family.” 

“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.” Fordo answered, coming closer. 

“No, but it’s his choice.” Rebec answered, with a shade of her sister’s sharpness. “Do you know why he asked me to paint him with that pattern?”

“Because it matched his armour.” Wrathor observed, coming over to join them. 

“Because it was his only link to the past.” She explained. “He cleaned the design off the armour before he sold it but he kept it, on himself. Because it was all he had that could tell him who he was.” She looked around the squad, all openly listening now. “And it a way it did, because it led you to him. I know things didn’t go… the way anyone wanted them to, but I know he still wants to know you. And himself.” 

She looked over to Fordo. “Will you visit us, when your mission is over? I know my sister can be hard work. She’s just protective, that’s all. But Tahl will want to know you’re okay. And so do I.” She held a hand out to Fordo. “You’re his family. Which makes you mine too.”

Fordo took her hand after a moment’s indecision. “Then we’ll do our best to visit. If the war allows.”

“Thank you, captain.” She glanced over her shoulder. “Will you tell him that, before you go? He’s out of the tank at the moment. And I know he’d like to see you.” She looked to Crispy, “And you. All of you.”

Crispy nodded. “Then we’ll come. Say goodbye before we go.” 

***

The hardest part was bundling up the kittens. Wrathor had been distraught at the idea of leaving them behind, but he could see the logic of it. Crispy wasn’t much better but he tried to hide it, just so Wrathor wouldn’t be so upset. They had grown very attached in a very short time.

Rebec and Tahl met them in the medbay, the stump of his arm encased in a chunky metallic band. He gestured them to give him a moment, attaching the prosthetic with a click. He flexed skeletal black durasteel fingers, wincing as something didn’t quite move right. 

“SOrRY. STill ADJUstiNG”. 

Words came from a small amplifier built into the band around his ruined arm, reading tiny nerve impulses and converting them into sound, the volume varying as he learnt to control it.

“ThANk yOU For coMINg.”

“Hey man.” Wrathor grinned, “Had to come say hi. After all the work we did to get you out of there.”

“WRAThor, rigHT?” Tahl had taken time to familiarised himself with their names and records while he was in the tank, getting to know the brothers of his past. 

“That’s me.” Wrathor grinned, taking Tahl’s flesh hand. “It’s good to see you properly. Weird but good.” 

Tahl grinned. “YOU’re telLINg mE.”

Fordo and Crispy found themselves at the back of the room, watching as the squad chatted and joking naturally with the man who had once been a brother. They seemed to accept him as Tahl now; earlier and more comfortably than either the captain or lieutenant could. They glanced at each other, wordlessly sharing that last step of grieving. 

Rebec joined them, just leaning against the wall, quietly watching. “Thank you.” She whispered, smiling as Ridley and Gleeb joked about painted the prosthetic red. “This is… the right way to leave things. For now, anyway.”

Fordo nodded in agreement. He didn’t need to look at Crispy to know he felt the same. 

Little by little the Squad said their hellos and their goodbyes, drifting off to get things ready for departure. Wrathor was last to go, trading promises and threats over the kittens. “You better look after them! They need lots of attention. We don’t want to come back to find they’ve got fat and bored.” 

Tahl grinned, waving him away. “ThEY’ll BE SPoilt roTTEN, I pROMIse.” He glanced up at Fordo and Crispy, his expression turning serious as the others left. “ThANK you.” He nodded respectfully to the two men. “I know this hasn’t bEEN easy. FOr any of us.” He gestures clumsily with his metallic limb. “But thaNK You.” 

The captain advanced from the corner of the room with an abruptness that almost made Rebec jump. It was as if Fordo was a pillar holding up the ceiling itself, and when it was gone, she half expected the ceiling to collapse. It was almost an infectious feeling. The clone carried himself in such a deliberate, disciplined manner. No movement was an accident. Every gesture had a purpose. And every clone noticed and respected it. She realised she was beginning to as well. 

As Fordo approached Tahl, he extended his hand and placed it very gently on the arm of the bed. He nodded to Tahl, in another display of commanding presence. Tahl couldn't help but feel a noticeable feeling of approval from the man every clone seemed to revere.

"This is goodbye for now, Tahl. But I want you to know how proud of you we all are. You may not be the man we remember, but you have the same fire that burns in the rest of us clones. You're a warrior. And you will always have a place in our family." 

The words went straight to Tahl’s heart, like a piece of himself falling back into place. "I'll Do my best tO live up to thAT." The fact the vocalisations wavered so little was a sign of just how much weight was behind those words.

Fordo extended the same hand to shake Tahl's. To his surprise, he was met with a firm grip. Tahl and Fordo shared a slight grin. 

"Like I was saying," Fordo laughed. "Tahl, there is one more thing," Fordo started. "The last time we saw you. The last time you were, well, Hugin. You were on a very important mission, protecting a data chip. Do you remember anything about it? Do you remember where it is now?"

At the question, Tahl looks over to Rebec, signing something without engaging the speech circuit.

"Of course, I still have it." She answered, reaching in under her shirt for a shard of pearlescent crystal on a chain. "It was the first thing you ever gave me." She held it up to the light for Fordo to see. "Is this it?"

At the glance of the chip, Crispy's eyes lit up as he remembered how much pain it brought him. "This is how it all began..." He started, moving towards the captain and his friend. He felt emotions boiling up inside him. Feeling of relief, of happiness, of sadness. The training kicked in and helped him control himself. On the outside, he smiled. A warm, genuine smile. He hadn’t done that in... some time. "I guess that's it...we finally completed our mission, old friend." Looking to the captain he said: "We finally can put this nightmare to rest."

Tahl felt it too - the roil of emotions. But without the trooper’s discipline, it was harder for him to hide. "When you geT BACK, will you tell me HOw it happENED? HOw we got- here?" After so long of missing a part of himself, of being afraid of that missing part, he was now afraid to let go of it.

"Of course, vode." Fordo reached for a utility compartment in his belt. From it emerged a small disc with a single switch. "We'll trade you this for the chip. It should be a good reminder of where you came from." He handed the disc to Tahl, who resisted the urge to press the switch until the captain and his men left.

After a brief pause, Fordo shook his head. "Right under our noses the whole time," he mused, in regard to the chip. 

“Yeah,” Rebec grinned playfully. “But considering where I had it stashed. you weren’t going to find it in a hurry.” 

The remaining members of Red Mist started to chuckle. After a moment, it turned into an infectious belly laugh that filled the room. The coincidence teamed with the stress of the past months of worry were too much even for the Captain to not appreciate. The laughter died down and Fordo flashed a smile to Rebec. "I'm sorry to confiscate something with emotional meaning, ma'am. But after all, we're the ones getting the short end of the stick. You get to keep Tahl."

"Oh, I don't know." Rebec wiped a tear from her eye from laughing so hard. It wasn't even that funny but the release was exactly what they all needed. "I get to look after the kittens so it's not all bad." She gave Tahl a gentle nudge, rubbing his back where the laughter has made him breathless. "Thank you, all of you. I look forward to seeing you all again when you get back. Maybe I can paint something on you? After all, you qualify for family rates now."

Wrathor and Ridley both beamed at that, glancing at each other with the air of people already planning their next design. “We’ll hold you to that.” Wrathor grinned. “You know I’m gunna want a panther tattoo after this!” 

Crispy savoured the last moments before they left. His mind drifted away, wanting to stay in the present, with his brothers. But the simple notion of 'when you're back...' threw him off balance. 

Would they be back? They were the Red Sist squad after all. One of the Republic’s most decorated squads. They handled missions no one else could handle. And... even they suffered casualties 'coming back' was not a promise any of them had the power to keep. Duty always come first and their lives were always in the hands over forces outside themselves. Maybe even the Force itself.

But it was a promise they made anyway. In the slender hope it could be kept. Crispy cursed his own mind. He was bad at embracing the happy little things. Maybe that was the lesson he needed to learn from Tahl – how to be happy. How to accept that things are good sometimes. After all he’d been through. Tahl was still smiling. 

Maybe losing the past wasn’t such a bad thing after all. Crispy just wished he knew how to do the same.

It soon became time for Red Mist to leave. The next mission called. After last goodbyes and promises from everyone, the troopers left, with Fordo and Crispy being the last two to go. 

Crispy turned around last time, feeling the weight of the past slowing him down. He felt he owed Hugin...Tahl one last truth. "Tahl. You wanted to know how you got here?" He paused and turning to him, expression almost painfully open. "I messed up. You saved me." He gestured towards the door, and the rest of the squad. "And with the chip, you saved them too. And every other clone out there." He put on his helmet and turned to leave. "You're a hero."

Tahl’s eyes followed Crispy out the door, wishing he knew how to answer.


End file.
